Stay Your Ass Home

In Samuel L. Jackson’s voice:
STAY YOUR ASS HOME

Corvid 19’s a pandemic;
You cannot defeat it alone.
So please find the druthers
To not infect others
By staying your ass at home.

This virus is spreading like wildfire,
So get this through your thick dome:
To flatten the curve
You must find the nerve
To stay your dumb ass at home.

Social distancing works as a safeguard,
The danger is not overblown.
The spread we must taper
You have toilet paper!
Stop fucking around and stay home!

You’ve got food and booze, you’ve got Netflix,
And Facebook on your mobile phone.
This isn’t the flu
So please find a clue:
Where should your ass be? At home!

You may think “well I’m young and healthy,
And I like to wander and roam.”
Social distancing works
So don’t be a jerk
And for now keep your dumb ass at home.

There isn’t a cure or a vaccine,
The remedy is still unknown.
You might think you’re tough
I can’t stress this enough:
DON’T BE A DUMBASS: JUST STAY HOME.